Failed Burglar Asks, ‘Can I Have My Stuff Back?’

A gun-wielding homeowner chased off an inept burglar, only to receive a call from the robber later that day asking to trade for the gear he’d left behind.

Police in Bremerton, Washington responded to a 3 a.m. home invasion call. Evidently, the homeowner woke up to the sound of the intruder and chased the culprit off with a gun. The thief got away safely, but he accidentally left behind a bag that contained papers bearing his name. Woops!

Several hours later, the burglar called up the homeowner, offering to trade some of the items that he’d stolen in exchange for the bag he’d left behind. The homeowner did what anybody would do: he agreed, and then promptly called the police. The burglar received a not-so-warm welcome when he came back to the house. 

In addition to receiving the award of mankind’s dumbest thief, the burglar was actually quite polite. He was arrested peacefully and apologized to the homeowner. As ludicrous as all of this sounds, we swear: we’re not making this up

As great as this story is, the only thing missing is a recording of the phone conversation between the thief and the homeowner. We’d do just about anything for the privilege of hearing the world’s best example of poetic justice. 

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