Dear Santa: I want a .460 Rowland AR Upper

This is a transcribed conversation between Jim Downey and Kris Kringle, which was released on Dec. 6, 2011. Due to the sensitive nature of the call, much has been redacted.

Hey Santa. It’s me, Jim. Yeah, good to talk with you again. What’s that? … You’ve been waiting to hear from me? Yeah, sorry about that. You know how it is – things get busy this time of year. But I don’t have to tell you that, do I?

Anyway. Sorry I left it so late, and I’ll certainly understand if you can’t pull the necessary strings for this to work out like I want, but I thought I’d be honest about what I really want this year. Yeah, that debacle with my kidding about wanting the Eric Holder “Fast and Furious” AK Model still leaves a bad taste … No, no, I get it – you’re not really into guns – how were you to know that I was joking about … what’s that? Yeah, my appearance before the Senate sub-committee went fine, thanks. It was good to see Chuck Grassley again. He sends his regards, and we had a laugh over that time when we were all …

Well, anyway, back to the reason I called. You know I’ve had the good fortune to handle and shoot a lot of great guns over the years … Yeah, it’s been a lot of fun – well, OK, some of them haven’t been as much fun as they could be, but laws are laws, I understand that … No, that’s OK, you don’t need to intervene to get that ban lifted. We’re making progress on that front, and I’m sure that in time it’ll be resolved …

What’s that? You saw what? … Oh, yeah, those ARE nice. But man, I’d be afraid to even take something like that out of the house, let alone go hunting with it. Too rich for my blood. I’d be worried I’d have to send it in for work to fix something, and would need to sell my car to afford the insurance on the thing …

Nah, I’m a lot more into nice guns, maybe something that has had a little shop work done to it, but nothing too far out there. Which gets me back to what I was thinking about this year: a PDW. That stands for Personal Defensive Weapon … MMhmm, like a short carbine … Nah, not full-auto. Too much hassle. Same for the Short Barrel Rifle thing. Better to do it on a pistol platform …

Who makes them? Well, there are a number of nice ones out there. Yeah, HK has … and FN … but I was thinking of building my own … yeah, on an AR platform. AR? Well, it’s what a lot of people call “black rifles” … Yeah, that’s it. Like what the US military uses. You got it. Right.

But when we tested the .223 round for BallisticsByTheInch.com earlier this year, I was really unimpressed with how much it loses with a short barrel … Yeah … Oh, a lot of people swear by them for police work and whatnot. But I was thinking of another round we tested this year: the .460 Rowland

Yeah, not too many people know that cartridge, but it’s pretty impressive. Basically, think of it in terms of a suped-up .45 ACP. The ballistics are just a bit shy of a .44 magnum for similar barrel lengths … What’s that? … Well, I’m not sure why the round didn’t catch on. I think a lot of people didn’t see the point in it for a pistol round. But for something like this, it’d be almost ideal. Yeah, a heavy chunk of lead moving pretty fast …

Nah, it wouldn’t be that great in terms of armor piercing, which is one of the ways people think of PDWs. But I don’t live in a war zone … That’s right … Right … Just for home defense, mostly. And the nice thing is, all my .45 ACP loading dies will work to reload the cartridge. Yeah. Most people don’t know that, and it helps make it a lot more affordable …

So, where to get one? Well, there are a couple of places with reputations who make AR components in the .460 Rowland … Yeah. I’d go to Bazooka Brothers, probably. But there are other places … What components? Well, what I really want is called an “Upper” … Yeah, that’s right. Just tell them that you want an “AR Upper Receiver in .460 Rowland” with an eight-inch barrel … Right. Oh, no, no. No, don’t worry about the rest of the components. Part of the fun of something like this is playing with the different possible configurations … Yeah, like a puzzle … Right. The Upper is the main thing – I’ll get all the rest …

Cool. Thanks … Yeah. Yeah … No, seriously, just the Upper is more than enough. And when I get it all put together, we’ll go out to the range and you can give it a try … Right. Who knows, you may decide you like it enough to get one for yourself … Well, I mean, you guys are kinda remote up there. Long way from the local cops, if you know what I mean … Wouldn’t hurt … Right. And you do travel at night a lot. Just something to think about …

Hey, good chat … Yeah. Yeah, will do. My regards to the missus. Cheers!

Photos courtesy of Galt Museum and Ammo-one.com

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